Expectations

 

The warp is beamed, ready to thread.  But I'm having a lot of pain so I don't think I'll be managing to begin threading today.  My next back injection is Tuesday, then 3 days of 'light duties' and then I'll see how I'm feeling.  I may try threading a bit as part of those 'light duties' but I've lined up a few other things that also need to be done and are truly 'light' when it comes to the 'duty' so we'll see how it goes.

I'm really scraping hard on the bottom of my cotton stash so I beamed a warp of 2/20 merc. cotton (left over from a couple other things) and will begin by weaving off the last of the Lithuanian linen.  This will make a really lovely quality of cloth (I've 'sampled' it - it's nice tea towel cloth)  There truly is almost nothing left of the linen, but then I've got a gigantic cone of unmerc. 20/2 cotton to use up.  I've enjoyed weaving with the linen and the quality of cloth that results, but I think I need to focus on other things for a while.  Since sales are pretty much non-existent right now, I don't really want to spend the money to buy more if all they are going to do is sit in my ko-fi shop.  :(

The new threading draft is a variation on a Swedish Snowflake motif.  What can I say?  My brain has not been functioning due to sleep disruption due to the pain medication, but I should also get a new drug next week so I'm anxious to try it and see if it is any better than the rest.  In the meantime I'm trying to not...challenge...myself too much.  But I also feel the need to weave, just for the physical activity (and the dopamine top up.)

I was moaning to a friend the other day about what I should do - maybe make my 'standard' warp length shorter.  But she pointed out all that meant was that I would get less weaving time per loom dressing time, meaning I would be doing even *more* loom dressing and less weaving.  :(  She's right, of course!

And the tariffs are...paused...again.  For 90 days if you can believe what he says.  Do I do a pop up 'sale' while it is still possible to get things into the US without a tariff???  Dunno.  

Spring has about sprung here, but so far as I can tell we are still teetering on 'drought' conditions.  The bush is far too dry, the snow pack too small.  I hope that we are spared wildfires this year, although there is no reason that we might be, given climate change and...drought.

Given the state of North American politics, I suppose we can write off any expectation of help from US wildfire fighters, but hopefully our other allies will be able to.  Be interesting to see if the US expects Canada to send wildfire fighters to help them, like we did early this year, sending water bombers to help California...  Since I doubt the administration would appreciate the assistance, I'm not sure we should.  Or could, depending on what is happening here.

Every year it becomes more and more obvious that climate change is NOT a myth but very real.  And that it has arrived.  And that it will get worse if we don't DO something about it.  Our election on April 28 will be a watershed moment for our country.  I hope that Canadians meet the challenge and vote for those who are willing to try to *fix* things instead of letting everything burn to the ground.  In some cases, quite literally...(looking at you Jasper)...

However, Life Goes On, as they say, so I have contacted my local guild and suggested a weavers gathering on May 25.  I hope I have my copy of WEFT by then, and I will bring my samples for the two articles in that issue.  I have also suggested that if weavers are interested, we could do something similar after each issue comes out.  I'm also feeling like I would like to be more 'present' at the guild (IF I can get the pain under control and IF I can walk up the stairs to the guild room.)

So many changes, many of them not welcome.  But such is Life.  We have to try to figure out work arounds.  It's time to put the soup pot on.  Better get that done, too.  At least it means I won't have to 'cook' the next couple of days as my biggest pot makes enough for 3 days.  I'm glad Doug isn't picky and doesn't mind 'leftovers'...they are pretty much my favourite item on the menu, chez Laura's...

Production Line

 

I bit the proverbial bullet today and started working on the samples - again.

What you see in the photo are just *some* of the samples I wove - there is a bin on the back of the loom with more in it - because there just wasn't enough room on my work table to hold the rest.

My work table is a table of all 'work'.  This is where I cut/serge my things before wet finishing, then press it.  Between the serger and the press, plus some work 'clutter', there isn't really much room to do very much.  But I can sit while I work at something like this, and I have good task lighting, plus my other odds and sods.

I had done some prep work before I wet finished the samples - I needed to be able to match them up to their 'before with after', but it was still complex, and frankly, when working with fairly fine yarn (2/20 merc. cotton) to fairly thick (4/8 cotton) plus some other yarns I wanted to test, it was getting really hard to tell them apart.

If I was having problems identifying them, anyone else down the work chain would probably have an even harder time.  So, to make it easier for others (who may or may not be familiar with the yarns I used) I decided I'd better document them very carefully.

Since I haven't been feeling...great...it was a level of 'detail' work I really wasn't in the mood to do - but needs must.  I have made a promise to myself that before beginning another article I will finish the one I'm working on.  My brain only processes so much before it becomes overwhelmed and I can't function - at all.

I cut it close on this article because I have already begun working on the 'next' article.  The loom is about to become 'nekkid' because I cut the warp off yesterday, cut/serged yesterday afternoon, then inspected/repaired this morning.  Those towels are ready to go into the washer, but now I want to beam the next warp.  Because that task takes up *all* the space behind the loom.  And since I need to sit on that stool at the work table to press - and there is just no room for me to do that while the loom is set up to be beamed - it's just easier if I get that done and out of my way first.  So that's the job for tomorrow.

Otherwise I spent several hours going through the samples, making sure I had them identified properly, write out 'string' tags to affix to the samples for easy identifying, and then double (or more) checking them as I attached them, suddenly the afternoon is pretty much gone.

I'm not sure if I have the spoons to finish putting away the samples and begin setting up for beaming.  At this point I suspect it must be 'tea' time.

And a pat on my back for getting that part (that I had been *dreading*) done.  Now to do one more pass through the text, correct the list of the samples (I made a couple boo-boos) and then collecting everything to go into a box for when it is time to mail it all to the magazine.

Will I learn anything about *not* procrastinating about a task that I don't want to do?

Doubtful...

The Bog of Life

 

one repeat and borders of the Swedish Snowflake design

Recently I have been playing around with the 'Swedish Snowflake' draft.  One of the things I like to do is muck about and find out what other options are available within a threading draft, especially in the twill 'family'.

In the meantime, Life goes on, frequently more bog-like than a stroll in the park.

I don't know if I am my mother's daughter, or if she just taught me well - either way, especially right now - I have her advice running on repeat:  God helps those who help themselves.

It was one of her favourite sayings and I have had it embedded in my personality, I suppose, be it genetically, or just from constant repeats as I grew up.  And then learned that Life was always going to be more bog-like than park.

As I got older I learned other pithy comments that I absorbed.   The part 2 of the above sentiment is one I learned as a teenager:  Prayer is good, but while you are praying for change, pray for the strength to make the changes you want to happen in the world.

I asked mom one time what her comment meant and I don't remember her actual explanation, but as an adult I have used it to remind me that God is probably more likely to help those who are working hard to improve things themselves.  And if they don't have the time to deal with 'my' problem, maybe I could fix it without involving them?  So, praying for the strength to effect the changes I want to see in the world has always made perfect sense to me.

As a person, I would say that I am solution oriented.  If I see a problem, I will mull it over and try to work out an effective way to 'fix' it.  Or make it suck less.

This week has been challenging as I try - still - to get a grip on my current physical issues.  It took the best part of the week to talk to everyone I felt I needed to talk to, to help me get through this particularly bog-like section of Life.  I finally managed that this morning, after playing telephone tag, trying to juggle several medical professionals and their overbooked days.  I am blessed with an ever growing (it seems) group of health care professionals who are trying to give me the tools to manage my 'old age' and the culmination of physical challenges.

I can still weave - although at a slower pace than previously.  But neither do I need to produce at the same levels I did for the better part of 50 years.  So I have been working on my 'expectations' - what *can* I do, vs what I *want* to do.

Bottom line?  I still want to teach, if I can.  So writing for WEFT has been a god-send (literally!) and they seem to like what I've sent to them (so far).  I reached a point where I just could not finalize the current article, but after talking the doctor this morning, I feel like I've made it through the bog and have hopes of a 'hail Mary' change of medication next week.  He just needs to do some research before he approves the medication - which is off even the off-list pain meds.

I am eternally grateful I live in Canada where medical decisions are between a patient and their doctor (and pharmacist, other specialists) and zero interference by profit generating 'health insurance' companies.  And no, we won't vote Conservative as they insist that health care needs to be 'privatized'.  

Anyway, today I will finish the current warp on the loom, label the samples for the article, read through the text once more and then hit 'send', maybe Sunday night or next Monday.  Next week I have light duties for 3 days after my next back injection, so one of the things I will be doing is fine tuning the next sample warp for WEFT, then setting up the loom to weave the sample(s).  And hope that, by this time next week, I'll be feeling 'better'...

Wishing all y'all 'better', too...

Best Laid Plans (and all that)

 

Human beings, generally, are planners.  We tend to make plans that are do-able, frequently 'best case scenario'.  It's hard to think about the things that will tend to throw our plans 'off' when that nice straight line is sooooo attractive!

But reality is that most people's lives do not proceed in a nice straight line.  Thangs happen.  Or not.

You would think that at my age I would be used to plans going awry.  But no, a part of me maintains that if things just go the way I want them to do, every deadline will be met, every project finished on time, no 'mistakes' or oopsies will need to be fixed.

We have finally arrived at what looks suspiciously like 'spring'.  I am about 7.5 months out from the brain bleed, and still dealing with all the 'other' things my body is annoyed about.  The past two weeks have been challenging and I have fallen down on my attempt to follow The Plan.

I still have several hours left to finish the current article, but I keep waiting until I have more energy, or even just 'feel like it'.  I am poised at the point of 'change' and not entirely sure what direction I will go when I get out of the current trough.

So much depends on what happens over the next couple of weeks before I will be able to judge how much energy (or not) I will have at my disposal.  

Today I had an appointment that cancelled, so instead of a big chunk taken out of my afternoon, I will stay home.  Who knows, maybe I will open my Word file and do the 'inventory' of the samples I wove for the current article.  I don't know how much use the list will be, but it will be useful for myself, if I do 'programs' for the local guild showing my articles/samples to the local weavers.

One of the things I plan on is to begin driving again.  I get the next back injection next week, and I'm going to see if driving is something that I can manage.  

In the meantime, the clock keeps ticking, and we are in suspense until the election is over and we see what direction Canada will go.  I suspect it will not be 'peaceful' given the rise of the alt right, with their big lies and buckets of mis/dis/information.  

In the meantime, I focus on writing about weaving and cloth.  If the apocalypse happens, people will need to know how to make cloth (and clothing).  The least I can do is try to share some of what I know and help the craft stay alive - at whatever level anyone is wanting to pursue it.

Onwards!

Debut

 

Yesterday I got a peep at the new WEFT magazine.  

I have enjoyed writing several articles for WEFT, and am working on the next.  (Just finished roughing out the draft for one of the examples.)

One of the things I am struggling with right now is a distinct lack of energy.  I'm not sleeping much, which I'm thinking is an adverse reaction to the current pain meds, and I am really having a hard time getting my engine started - and keeping it going.  After a lifetime of being 'on' almost every day, it's disorienting and disturbing to find myself more limp than anything else.

I have one more drug to try, and I'm hoping to get permission to start that next week.  But it looks like I've nearly run through my options for pain control.

Someone recently suggested to me that ultimately I am going to have to 'choose my pain'.  Not a message I wanted to hear, but the comment has stuck with me and I'm trying to make my peace with what is happening to my body - and my ability to do much.  

As we get older, our bodies begin to wear out and down.  My expectations of being able to weave like I used to do in my 30s etc., are having to be adjusted.

Part of me struggles with acceptance, but it looks like this year is going to be a time of changing circumstances and adaptation to the lack of drive and determination that carried me for nearly 50 years.  And still does, to a certain extent.  The only way forward is to find out what I can *actually* do, and then find enjoyment in being able to do 'that'.

I'm trying to taper off 'producing' so much - which I then have little ability to sell.  But that doesn't mean I can't weave 'samples'.  

With the whole world walking on tip-toe, wondering when saner heads will prevail, trying to weave to sell seems an exercise in frustration.  Since I've done a pretty decent job of weaving down my stash (to certain levels of 'decent') my energy and thoughts are tending to focus on the topics for WEFT and what I feel capable of doing.  And then, of course, they need to be interested.

So what *will* I be doing?  Frankly, I have no idea.  I'm hoping to feel 'better' with my 'hail Mary' pain medication, but I have to also prepare myself for it to not work very well.  

I have enrolled in the pain management classes sponsored by the pain clinic, so I'm hoping to learn some things from those.  

The next month is going to be...fraught...with our federal election on April 28, trying one more pain medication, start attending the pain management classes.  And keep weaving.  

Right now I can still weave and I mostly manage two 45 minute sessions a day.  For 90 minutes a day I can shut my brain off and just 'be' at the loom.  

Hopefully after the next few weeks things will begin looking 'better'.  And if not, time to get into the trenches and work on making the most of what *is*, not what I *wish*.

In the meantime, I have one article just in the 'polishing' and organizing state, and the next article is taking shape.  I'm nearly finished the current warp and the next should be good to toss onto the loom late next week.  And then see what comes down the pipeline - and if I can scrape up the energy to work on something that people might be interested in reading...  

Anyway, if you are interested in this new magazine, I do encourage you to take a look.  It is available in print or digitally.

New Weavers

 

after wet finishing

loom state

One of the nice things I see is the appearance of new weavers in groups online.  It makes me feel good to think that interest in the craft of weaving is continuing to attract new 'younger' weavers.

I'm also very happy to see some of these new weavers asking about wet finishing.  But most of the groups I belong to say 'NO sales' - so I can't post links to my books.  Sometimes I will share this blog - because it is free.  

In spite of all the economic upheaval right now, my books are still available - and since they are printed in the US, there should not be any tariffs for US customers.  As for magazines, the only one I am currently writing for is WEFT - and again, I don't feel able to let groups know because I'm not allowed to 'sell' things.

So, if you are a fan of this blog - you can share the link.  If you are a fan of my books or classes, it would be nice if others would share them.

And if you belong to Goodreads, you could leave a review on The Intentional Weaver.  Last I looked, only one person had published a 'review' and they pretty much trashed the book because it had so many 'typos'.  I wonder if they were objecting to the British spellings...because we worked damn hard to remove as many typos as we could.  

So, a reminder:

Books are available here

In addition to some short video (amateur) clips on You Tube, classes are available at Sweet Georgia and Long Thread Media

Community

 

When my samples were returned from WEFT after being photographed, they included a lapel button.

For a moment I had regrets that I am no longer travelling so that I could go to a conference and wear my 'contributor' button.

I've been contributing to magazines for a rather long time, so it's not like seeing my name in a list of contents is 'new'.  But it's a 'new' magazine, and it seems a bit special to be included.

What the button did for me, however, was remind me that weaving is a community.  And while too many forces in our society are, right now, trying to rip people apart from their communities, to take a stand and say 'this is my community' is much more important than to ignore it.

It is through community that we find support, encouragement, find answers to questions.  In this time, standing up for one's community is - in many ways - a political act.  An act of resistance.

I am, frankly, flattered that the editorial staff seem to like what I'm providing.  There are many times I have been chastised - for my focus on efficiency, my equipment choices, my standards.  It took me a few years to understand that we all get to choose.  And to realize that everyone needs to make the choices that are appropriate for *them*.  

Gradually I got to the point that my focus was to provide the information, document the 'spectrums' that are built into the craft, and help people decide which were appropriate for them.

Ultimately the craft of weaving has far fewer unbreakable rules than it does cases of 'it depends'.  

As I have been weaving the samples for WEFT, I have had time to explore many of those 'it depends' issues.  Over and over again I am reminded of how little I truly 'know' and how much I tend to tweak what I am doing to encourage the quality of cloth I want to be brought into reality.

Sometimes it works.  Sometimes, it doesn't.  

But every warp, every project, increases my knowledge.  And if what I know (or suspect) is helpful to someone else, then the time/yarn/money I have spent exploring that particular rabbit warren has been worth every penny.

Because knowledge is never a waste of time.  And community is necessary to help grow the foundation of knowledge of the craft.

The first issue will begin arriving soon.