Creative Energy

 

This 'meme' crossed my Facebook feed this  morning.  It is labelled as 'Old Proverb' without saying which culture, although with the incredible tile work, I'm assuming Islamic.

But it reminded me that working with some thread crosses every culture, in some format.  And it reminds me that creative energy is a positive one (by and large).

In this time, so many people are channeling their creative energies to spread mis/dis-information, that it is hard to tell, sometimes, what is actually positive or negative.

When I wrote Stories from the Matrix I felt the touch of the 'divine'.  I would sit down with my 2nd cup of coffee and place my hands on the keyboard, usually not having any idea what I was going to write about (mostly) and the words would just...come.

Granted I was in a space of reflection, so I was open to letting my sub-conscious have full rein.  I would type for about an hour, and as the thoughts flowed to my conscious brain, I would sometimes have a revelation - a flash of understanding - about something that had been simmering on the back burner of my brain.

Now that I'm recovering from an actual brain injury, I have been spending a lot of time too exhausted to think.  Having the articles to do for the magazine has helped enormously, because I get intrigued with the topic and I can find some energy to get to the studio.  What I find 'different' is that my level of energy is very shallow, and I feel tired all the damn time (even more than I did prior to the fall.)

So most days I take an afternoon nap.

Society seems to be going through some shaking up.  It's hard to see it happen, but I have to remember that people doing creative, *positive* things will help.  I may only help one or two people, but that is better than not helping anyone else.  

By getting to the studio every day (that I can) I feel 'better' about myself.  I can gauge how much my recovery is progressing.  I feel productive.  And I love learning new stuff.  This slower 'pace' of weaving is becoming more 'comfortable'.  I no longer do shows (in person) so I'm not selling nearly as much as I used to.  So I don't really need to 'produce' like I used to do.  

But I do like giving people gifts, especially my health care team.  After all, they keep me going and enable me to get to the loom.  And whatever sales I do make helps pay for the bills.  And the yarn.  Because now that I'm weaving to illustrate my writing, I need to buy project specific yarns.  :)  

I'm weaving more samples for the current article because I'm not certain I have it 'right' yet.  I realized last night that I could - if I need to - weave the entire warp up as 'samples'.  And more gifts to present to people who have helped me, especially the past nearly 4 months.  It's hard to believe that I fell less than 4 months ago - and how much my life shattered when I came crashing down to the ground.

As long I can get to the loom, I can get into my happy place, and - perhaps - gently touch the divine.