Wednesday, April 8, 2020

The Prize


With plans for the year crumbling around our ears, it is very difficult to remain positive and hopeful. 
We are disappointed, of course we are.  It is completely normal that something we looked forward to being cancelled makes us sad.  We are allowed to grieve for the events that are cancelled, the opportunities we were looking forward to, being lost.

Some people manage to find the silver lining in every cloud, even when there doesn't appear to be one. 

Right now I am balancing my hopes and dreams against my disappointment.  As I get older, I feel the running of the sand through my personal hour glass.  When I chose to retire, my plan was to keep teaching and I had three Olds classes scheduled that I was very excited about.  Especially the level four class in Cape Breton.  I had seen most of the people who intended to enroll in that class through level one and two, and it felt 'right' to see them through four.  Complete the cycle, as it were.

But Fibre Week is cancelled for this year, as are many other fibre events.  I expect Convergence will also be cancelled, and even if it isn't?  I don't think I am going to go, even if I can't get a refund on my ticket.  (Some airlines are giving vouchers, not actual refunds.)

I am in the compromised category three times - my age and two underlying health conditions that make me more vulnerable to dying from the virus.

Over the past 12 years I have had to Press Pause on Life several times - cardiac issues, broken ankle, cancer, back to cardiac, cancer again (still).  And now?  Pandemic.

I have had to learn to let go of my desires in the face of things I cannot control.  I won't sugar coat it - it's hard.  It is especially hard when it is happening to everyone, all around the globe.  So many people are getting sick, so many people dying.  So many people losing their jobs, their business, their goals on hold, maybe never to be attained.

As the size of this impact on humanity begins to be seen, people are rightly concerned about what happens after.  Well, that kind of depends on the leadership of the politicians currently in charge.  Some are working tirelessly to try to mitigate what is happening, and I am quite sure are well aware of the kinds of things that will be required when the stay at home directives are over.  They will be looking at how to begin reopening the economy and supporting their citizens while it happens. 

Others?  Appear to be actively harming their citizens in a quest for...money?  Power?  Both?

For us, the 'ordinary' folk, I believe that the best way to deal with this is to keep our eyes on the prize - surviving.  Some events are postponed in hopes that the disease will be better controlled later in the year.  Some are outright cancelled.  This morning I heard that Vav in Sweden is now moved to next year.

Fibre festivals all over North America are cancelling in hopes of coming back next year.  Classes are cancelled until next year.

In the meantime, we can continue to learn.  To grow.  To be supportive of each other.  To hold each other in light and love.

Love to you all.


No comments: