This is an old photo but it seems I have let my life get out of control. Again.
I've been having trouble sleeping, getting frustrated with always feeling tired and in pain, not wanting to do much of anything.
Unfortunately swimming in denial doesn't deal with the approaching deadlines and they are reaching critical stage and I'm wondering if my body/brain have simply reached the stage where it cannot cope and therefore, isn't allowing me to sleep.
Last week it wasn't pain keeping me awake, it was thought squirrels, rampaging in my brain. And of course brain fog due to pain/pain killers doesn't make things any easier.
However, a few things *have* been done, and others are now underway, I just have so few spoons progress seems agonizingly slow. As I have to shift things from pillar to post to do some of the things on my to-be-done list, I frequently throw my hands up and go have a nap.
This morning the smoke is less, thankfully, and I managed to get back to sleep after only an hour of wakefulness so perhaps that is allowing me to think more clearly. Yesterday I had an x-ray on my painful hip and today I get a bone density test. The bone density wasn't really on my radar until I bought my last dose of Prolia and saw the new price - and took a big gulp. Decided I needed to find out if I should keep taking it (injection, every six months) or if I can stop for a while. Still 'cheaper' than a broken hip, but honestly! It's nearly doubled in price in the 11 or so years I've been taking it. :( Since I'm 'self-insured', when prices go up, I pay for it myself.
I got started making the aprons for the guild looms and this morning laid out a plan to get them finished. Doug will set up the long tables in the carport so I can mark out the pockets to make the tabs. But first I have to sew the rod pockets. Before I can do that, I need to press the towels I ran through the washer/dryer and wasn't able to press yesterday because I had a zoom presentation. Since my studio does double/treble/quadruple duty as weaving studio, wet finishing studio and online studio...well, I had to prioritize. The pressing got delayed. But I don't like leaving damp cloth for too long, so today I really have to begin pressing those and get them to the next step. There are 20 towels, so will likely need to do it over two days. And before I can do any of that? The sewing machine needs to be unburied from the pile of crap that has accumulated since it was used last.
We are well into August now and things seem to be speeding up after months of delay, delay, delay. My first fall presentations begin in September. One is at 7 am my time. I'm going to need ALL my spoons to do that one! OTOH, it will be fun to see one or two familiar faces as I actually know a couple of people in that guild.
And that's another thing. Zoom recently announced changes to it's terms and conditions. I find myself unhappy with what they propose. They are back tracking, but so far not actually changing the published conditions, just trying to convince people the conditions don't mean what they say they mean. I took a long hard look at how frequently I've used Zoom over the past year, the price of a professional membership and decided that I will be notifying them I will not be renewing.
And maybe then I will stop dreaming up yet more things I *could* be doing since I am paying for a 'professional' account with Zoom anway, might as well make it worth using? And ya know, actually 'retire'?
On the other, other hand, things are moving on the #4 book project. The editor has the files in their possession, I have heard back from a couple of alpha readers and it looks like one of them will write a Foreword. I still need to choose photos to include and wait for the edits to come back from the editor.
The anticipated publication date for this one is Dec. 2.
Magic was launched during my birthday 'week' in 2002. The Intentional Weaver on Dec. 2 (my brother's birthdate), Stories from the Matrix on my birthday. Seems right that #4 should be on my brother's birthday again. Plus that makes a nice spacing, not wanting to cram them too close together! Plus a more reasonable deadline, given all the work that still needs to happen.
I have been getting messages saying that Stories are being received. But of course people still need to read it, so the wait continues. I have had a couple folk let me know they will write a review for their guild newsletter, so hopefully word will get out and orders will trickle in, much like they do for the other two books.
But I also have that workshop for the local guild to get ready, another 'I donwanna' thing that needs doing. I feel like the new weavers will flounder if they don't get one more workshop under their belts. And then I *may* suggest a weaver's study group. I'll see how things go with the upcoming medical appointments and what, if any, changes in treatment are proposed.
I'm the kind of person that likes to have A Plan. Who *needs* to have A Plan. And right now? Everything is up in the air, and on every side of me I see things that need to be addressed. Nothing can happen until things get done - either we do some research and get some critical answers about the feasibility of heat pumps, or we think seriously about replacing our not-all-that-old furnace. I find out if I have to keep 'treating' my pain, or if a 'repair' is even a possibility. And of course, the never ending stash that I keep weaving...
The days keep rolling, one into the other. I need to stop, take a breath, and deal with some of the deadline avalanche because it's about to come down and bury me.
Now if I could only stop coming up with 'new' ideas and things to do...
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