Friday, February 24, 2012

Feeling a Wee Bit Guilty

A friend calls my sitting at the loom weaving my 'happy place'.  I'm taking full advantage of that today.

This green warp is perfect - a complete no-brainer.  It's just a straight twill for the towel body and plain weave for the hems.  Although I count the picks for the hem, the towel is measured using my handy dandy ribbon measuring tape and I don't have to think at all.

Which is very good for me today as we are still on tenterhooks about mom.  She passed a 'rough' night last night so they are keeping her for one more day and will discharge her tomorrow.

In the meantime I'm still waiting for a phone call from WestJet to see when we can get her on a plane to come home.  Until I have a firm arrival date, there is nothing else I can do and everyone involved in her care has to wait.

I'm not good at waiting so having this very simple warp - all 11 meters of it - to work on today while I'm waiting is a god send.

I am also struggling with guilt.  Guilt that I am hitting the highway on Tuesday morning, come sun or snow and I'm not coming back until the 25th or 26th of March (depending on highway conditions).  Everything that can be done for mom's care has been done and ultimately she will recover in her own time in her own way whether I'm here or not so I confess I'm actually relieved I'll be away for a while.  And then I feel guilty all over again.

Better to just leave and put my mind on my 'happy' things, like weaving and teaching weaving.  The stuff that I can make a difference about - and leave mom to get on with her healing....

The good news is that it looks like the house sale will go through so that will be one less thing to worry about for everyone, especially Doug who has been doing the bulk of the Mr. Fix-it jobs on it for years.  :)


Sandra Rude said...

I'm glad you have a 'happy place' to keep you going during all the uncertainty. I think weaving does that for a lot of us. Best wishes for your mom, and safe travels for you!

Laura said...

Hi Sandra, in many ways weaving has become my therapy, too. :)
The good news is that I pushed through with the airline and got tickets for Monday afternoon. Mom will be back in her own apartment by Monday evening. A nurse will visit daily until she feels mom is okay, and home help will come in daily for meals and light housekeeping. Everything is settled now, and I'm heading back to the loom and some more happy. :)

Andrew Kieran said...

Hi Laura, hope your mum gets better soon. I too understand how comforting a simple warp can be, not having to think at all. I recently made a tartan scarf in 2/7's worsted because I was depressed and sick of complicated multi-layered structures.

For me weaving is about taking time and being patient. When the weaving's going good I could almost sing for joy

Laura said...

When I get into the zone the physical act of weaving is amazingly soothing. I'm over the half way mark on the warp and hope to finish it today, wet finish it tomorrow and then get stuck into the packing. Monday I'll be at the clinic for at least 4 hours, then massage, pick up mom at 4 pm and get her settled. 3 more sleeps and I'm hitting the highway. :0

Really looking forward to meeting more weavers in NC/FL and a 'rest' week in Seattle before returning home. :)


Louisa said...

Don't feel guilty! You've done all you can do and sometimes you just have to leave things to work themselves out. Your mom will be fine. So will you. And Doug (and his repair skills) is a gem!

Laura said...

Just talked to mom - she's sounding *much* better than a couple of days ago! We've arranged for someone to say in the apartment with her Monday night. :)