Of Omelettes

And so it has begun.

You can't make an omelette without breaking the eggs. 

Yesterday I started stripping the loom of it's heddles.  I had thought to sell them, but it turns out they appear to be a tiny bit longer than the usual length.  Mine, even the new ones, never been on a loom, measure 320 mm while the TexSolv website says 318 mm is their standard.  I don't know if that 2 mm would make much difference so long as all the heddles on one shaft were the same length, but I don't know if anyone wants to chance buying them.  I just hate to see +4000 heddles go into the landfill.  OTOH, there are plenty to outfit an entire 60" weaving width loom.

I did have one person express an interest, but she hasn't gotten back to me about them, so it will just have to wait until I'm home from Olds.  Plus she may not want all 4000 anyway. 

While I have felt a small pang beginning this disassembly, what I regret most is the decisions I wasn't quite ready to take, that have been pretty much forced upon me.

I was ready to let go of the AVL and replace it with the Megado.  I wasn't ready to shut down my business.  I find that is what I am feeling the most - regret for the things that will not now be.

OTOH, the universe - or whatever - has been shoving me in that direction for several years.  Me, being as stubborn as I am, was refusing to go there.

I am not stupid, but I can be very very slow to change direction.

But it is time.  Beyond time.  I commented to my accountant yesterday that I know people who have been happily retired since age 55.  I'm turning 69 in less than a week. 

So many times during my life I have had my choices derailed.  At times it was health issues - my own or family members.  Death in various ways, including death of dreams.  Life roads that suddenly end because that bridge really was on fire and there was no going that direction no matter how much I desired what was on the other side. 

Acceptance is not giving up but a clear eyed understanding that sometimes?  Sometimes you are not meant to be doing that thing, going that direction.  Acceptance is understanding where you are right now so that different choices can be made.  Acceptance lets go of anger at being stymied and acknowledging what can be achieved instead.  If I can't do that, what can I do?  Oh, this!  This looks nice...

Inevitably the new direction became fulfilling and satisfying in a way that was completely unexpected.  The growth and learning always made me a more well rounded person.  Hopefully a 'better' person - more understanding, more compassionate.

Still working on the 'patience' lesson...

Several people have contacted me about parts.  One very eloquently commented that she would be honoured to have parts of my loom become a part of hers.  I thought of DNA, of organ donors.  I am happy to see parts of this loom go on to serve well in another loom, another context, another life.

I leave tomorrow for Olds.  Doug will try to keep disassembling the loom while I'm away, although he's in the midst of doing some Mr. Fix-it jobs for several people, so I'm not sure how much he'll be able to do here.  But it needs to be torn apart so that the Compu-Dobby (and parts), the small sectional beam with brake assembly and the high pick auto-cloth advance can be delivered at the end of the month.  Someone attending Fibre Week at Olds asked about lags and she will get what I have left of those.

Another person has agreed to buy the old style auto-cloth advance.  I have a second set of pick wheels from 20->30 picks if anyone is interested.  They have wear but they are the ones I've been using and they work just fine. 

Someone else has inquired after the manual dobby and other parts - I may not hear back from her until I get home.

As for the loom frame?  We have a woodturner in mind but if he doesn't want the wood, there is a woodturner's guild here in town. 

At this point in time I have no idea what 2020 will bring.  Right now I'm just trying to get through this year and January, shutting the business end of my weaving practice down.  It feels like my new life is on hold until I can clear out the clutter of my old.

Until I can make that new 'omelette'.  In the meantime, eggs will be 'broken'...