End of the Line

This is it, the End of the Line.  The Last of the Shawl Warps.  #18 of 18.  Just two more shawls to weave and put a period at the end of it.

The rapid rate of recovery after surgery has slowed and, indeed, feels like it has come to a full stop, although I know that isn't really so.  It is just that now, recovery will be measured over weeks and months, not days.  I have been told by many that recovery from this surgery takes one to three years, depending on the person.  I know that after 13 weeks I'm only at the beginning of the journey.  Does that make me any less impatient?  Of course not.  Intellectually I know there is a ways to go.  Emotionally?  Not so much...

With the plateau I feel that it must surely be time to push the boundary a little bit harder.  Having so many of these 'easy' warps to do meant that I stayed the course, did not start pushing too soon but stuck with the promise to myself that I would weave all of these 'gentle' warps before I tried weaving more normally, i.e. with the same degree of physical effort I'm used to using.

As each warp came off the loom I found I could do a little bit more before I felt tired or achy, until with this one I didn't really feel any aches or pains at all.

These warps fulfilled several functions:  a) they allowed me to ease back into weaving, reminding my body very gently of the movements and effort I need it to perform; b)  I was able to clear three boxes of yarn out of storage - about 150 four ounce skeins; c) build badly needing inventory - about 50+ shawls.  All that needs to happen now is fringe tying, pressing, trimming and tagging.  They will be ready in plenty of time for the fall sales beginning in October.

This warp will come off tomorrow and then I will take a deep breath, turn the computer for the loom on and see just how far along in my recovery I really am.

Currently reading Murder 101 by Faye Kellerman

Deep Purple Haze

Silly me - I miscounted how many warps there are (or are going to be - I still haven't finished winding them all) and there are only 18, not 20.  I'm actually happy about that.  I'd decided that, in the spirit of recovery, I would weave all of these warps before I tried something a little more, well, physical.  So having two less than expected was actually quite a nice discovery.

I saw the physio today.  She spent nearly an hour talking with me about the surgery and how healing has been going, then did an extensive evaluation of where I am right at this minute.  She was pretty amazed at my range of motion, to which I think the massage treatments should be given credit for how well I can move my arms.

She will draw up a personalized exercise program, then let me have at it for a couple of weeks after which I'll go back for a re-evaluation.

Heard from the cardiologist's office today and she is sending me for more tests and unless anything untoward pops up, I probably won't see her for three months.  So I'm really glad I went ahead with starting physio (after getting approval from my family dr).

I'm looking forward to working on upper body strength.  I've really noticed how difficult some things are, that never were before.  Obviously I've lost a lot of muscle tone.  But muscles that are worked get stronger.  You just have to curb your impatience...

All About the Therapy

Two shots of the same shawl.  The top photo was taken with the ordinary flash, the bottom using the 'red-eye' feature of the flash.  The bottom photo is much closer to real life than the top photo.  I discovered by accident that using the red-eye feature gets me better representation of reds, especially.

This shawl has been wet finished and in the bottom photo you can see how open and airy it is as the blue of the table top shows through the cloth.

Some people get bored very quickly with weaving and won't even weave four place mats with the same threading/tie-up/treadling.

OTOH, I find weaving the same thing over and over soothing.  I don't mind any part of weaving, including weaving repeats of a textile to develop a line of scarves, place mats, shawls.  The colours may, or may not, vary.  Weaving the same quality of textile then becomes a working meditation or, as in the case of these shawls, very much therapy as I try to reclaim my physical fitness after surgery.

I'm still far from recovered, but healed enough that the work of rebuilding my muscles can begin.

On Tuesday I will start physio, but in the meantime I am gently working my way through these textured silk shawls.  My colour selection is limited to what I have left in inventory, but that's ok.  I have four shows coming up in Oct/Nov and if shawls continue to sell the way they did last year, having depth of stock will be A Good Thing.

And I am determined to use up as much of my stash as possible.  I have promised Doug I will not win the estate sale contest.  To that end we are doing two fibre shows this spring to try and sell off more of the re-sale yarns I have.  Whatever is left after those sales will have to be woven up by me, preferably as quickly as possible.

Since I am officially turning into a 'senior citizen' this summer, coupled with the long list of health issues that have suddenly (it seems like) reared their heads, I have some serious thinking to do about the future and how much I am willing - or able - to do.  But I really don't want to think about that too much until I find out what my new normal is going to be.  In the meantime, there will be a lot of repetition as I use up my rather extensive stash.  And that's ok by me.

Currently reading To Dwell in Darkness by Deborah Crombie

Ready, Set...

Now that week 8 is half over, and I still haven't heard from the cardiologist's office, I'm getting antsy.  One way of coping with it was to wind a bunch of shawl warps once Doug had enough skeins onto cones.  So for the past few days I have wound 7 warps and pulled potential wefts for them.  The top one doesn't have weft cones yet because now Doug needs to wind off more skeins.  Since I emptied quite a few cones, he now has enough to finish the job.

Not sure what I will do for the next few days but I'm definitely feeling like I need to increase my activity levels in order to continue to recover.  My goal is to walk at least once a day, preferably twice, although that doesn't always work out due to weather or appointments.

But I managed another milestone yesterday by getting my step count almost to 5000.  Mind you I think some of those steps were because I knitted for a while and Fitbit seems to think knitting is akin to walking.  :)  Still, it has been nice to see the numbers trending upwards.

Prior to this latest round of health issues my step count goal was 10,000, reduced to 7500 after the angioplasty and back blowing out last summer.  My goal is to get back to 10,000 - eventually.  But whatever number I get to, I want it to be more than 5000.

Everyone - and I mean everyone - keeps telling me walking is the best thing I can do.  I disagree.  I think weaving is the best thing I can do!  But I'm not quite there yet, so walking will have to do until I can.

Currently reading So Anyway by John Cleese

Over the Hump?

This is an old photo, but since my hemming pile is about the same size...

Well, not quite - I have actually been hemming the last few evenings and the pile is diminishing nicely.  Doug will soon have a pile of pressing to deal with.

I won't go into details, but I have this past year seen a lot of 'aging' happening plus some adverse effects from the surgery have left me much more compromised than I had hoped.  While it is still early days, plus some things have actually gotten better, I'm hoping to recover greater mobility than what I have at the minute.  But some things won't ever get 'better' and I am going to have to wait to find out what my new limitations are going to be.

As Bette Davis said, growing old is not for sissies...

That said, week 6 did see some significant improvement and today I took my first stand up shower which felt wonderful.  Sitting to shower just doesn't seem...right.

I have regained some mobility in my left hand and can now type reasonably well - except I keep hitting the Cap Lock key, which is annoying.  But at least I can type for short periods.  I'm hoping that as I keep working at the keyboard it will continue to improve.

Knitting was a challenge but I think played a big role is recovering movement in my hand.  Hemming was also..interesting...you take for granted the full use of your body and when you don't have that, all sorts of things become a lot more difficult.

Walking proceeds.  I did the full loop of the neighbourhood yesterday - twice.  With sunshine today I'm looking forward to doing that again.  But rain is predicted all next week, so I will have to dig out rain gear or go to the mall.

I'm still waiting on a phone call from the cardiologist's office for the all clear to begin physio.  I'm really hoping to get the call next week so I can begin the recovery part of the the journey now that the healing part is pretty much done.  I don't want to try weaving until I have that all clear and some physio to judge how much effort I can do without straining.  Weaving *is* physical, especially the way I do it.  I have to watch my heart rate and not send it too high, especially to begin with.  Of course I'm still on a fairly high dose of beta-blocker so I may not be able to do too much aerobic activity while I'm taking that.  Time will tell and I need to watch to make sure I don't overdo.

The biggest advance is that I'm beginning to think again.  I have had several things on hold because I just didn't have the brain power or energy to deal with them.  I think I'm nearly ready, especially now that I can more or less type again.

Quite a few people who have been through this surgery have been in touch.  It appears recovery can take up to three years for some people.  I'm hoping that it won't take that long for me.

Currently reading A Question of Identify by Susan Hill.  Apparently I've read it previously but I can't remember the ending so I will continue reading until I do - or I finish it.

Another Kind of Loom, Another Kind of Weaving

Well, I'm not sure I'll have the mental wherewithal to actually work on this any time soon but here it is.

I'm using a design from one of the books by Eeva-Liisa Kortelahti, a Finnish bobbin lace artist.  While I have done very very simple designs of my own, I can't come close to the artistry of Kortelahti.  I simply haven't done lace frequently enough to even think about trying to design something.  Not to mention my eyes aren't great and I'm having more and more difficulty seeing 'fine' threads.  So I enlarged this design and instead of using 50's thread (sewing thread) I'm using 2/20 mercerized cotton.  And still finding it hard to see.

However, I think I've got the kinks worked out - at least enough to be going on with.  Doug helped me set up a small table with a light and an old office chair, which appears to be just about the exact right height.

I've started piling clothes and personal items on the bed, including all of my pills (how did I ever come to need so many?) and a stack of books.  A friend dropped off a little gift bag with things like eye glass 'wipes', a book light, and various other small items that I'm sure will be much appreciated for the hospital stay.

Once the mail comes, hopefully bringing the rest of the bills for the month I will head to town for errands.  Then I suppose all that's left is to finalize the packing and wait for one more sleep.

Carrot #2

So now both looms have shawl warps on them.  This one is just two shawls long (about 9 meters), partly because the yarn is a highly textured silk that is very grabby, partly because I'm using up stash (yay!) and I have limited colours to work with.

The yarn is 10 epi and I'm trying to kiss it into place at 10 ppi.  Just a gentle squeeze is required and I'm hoping that weaving on this warp will be a gentle introduction back into weaving, build strength in the muscles, and encourage flexibility.  Not to mention, mental health!

I am also thinking that, seeing as how the roads hereabouts are going to be snow laden in Jan/Feb, my walking will be done in the studio, round and round and up and down the stairs as I gain strength.  Seeing the pretty warps on the looms will surely lift my spirits during the blah days of the dead of winter and give me incentive to keep going.

Katie asked about reading...yes I have a tall stack (several of them, in fact!) of books and I will list them here as I go through them.  I'm hoping to make a significant dent in my to-be-read pile and clear some of the clutter off the hearth and the guest room.

Carrot

Once again the colour isn't 'true'.  The weft is actually somewhat deeper, a sort of grey blue with purplish hints.  It looks almost silver here.

Since mobility is going to be a bit compromised for the first while, I figured I'd better get this warp actually weaving with the auto cloth advance set and ready to go.  Starting with the 2/10 Tencel at 28 ppi.  Which is very likely a mistake because when I went through my stash of 2/10 Tencel, I really don't have much left.  This blue, some red, some black and a variety of variegated yarns that are more in the earth tones.  I ought to have begun with the Bambu 12, of which I have a plentiful supply.

However, that said, I started with this one.

I thought I'd made a sleying error.  My math tells me I ought to have had an even number of dents with four per dent and I had one dent on the left with just two ends.  So using a contrasting colour I wove the header, but could not find any dent with only 2 or 2 too many.  What's a girl to do?  Keep calm and carry on!

Now that the AVL is all set up ready to go, I am going to get the shawl warp on the Leclerc.  Today I wound that warp and tomorrow I ought to be able to beam it although I do have some errands to run in the afternoon.  Since the warp is only about 240 ends, though, it should not take too long to thread, sley and tie on.

With both looms dressed waiting for me, I'll have lots of incentive to get back to the looms as soon as I can.  

Math Impaired

All set up ready to thread - I sit on a small stool, using the tall weaving stool as a desk for my threading draft and pencil to keep track of where I am in the sequence.

Unfortunately I'm a tad math impaired at the best of times, and right now?  Well, not exactly the best of times.  I've been very distracted and focus has been difficult.  Which is a long way of saying I made an essential math error when calculating this threading.

The good news is that I only have to take out 2 inches and re-thread the last 60 ends that I did just before lunch.  Well, that's what my math tells me right now.  We'll see if I'm any more accurate today than I was yesterday!

However, I can now say that I'm scheduled for surgery next Thursday, Jan. 22.  Travel arrangements have been made, hotel room booked.  I can still be 'bumped' by an emergency, but they will do me as quickly as they can if that happens.

I have been pretty open about my health issues, partly because I consider the wider weaving community to be a part of my 'family'.  When I need encouragement, you give it to me.  When I need comforting, I find it amongst you.  When I need to hear success stories, you provide them.

So I apologize if I share too much at times.  But please know that I value your being there more than I can possibly say.

We leave on Tuesday so my goal from now until then is to finish setting up the AVL with this shawl warp and wind another shawl warp to go onto the small loom.  That way both looms will be dressed for when I feel able to get some weaving done.

Mom made a really excellent recovery after her open heart surgery a couple of years ago so I'm hoping for the same for me.  With two pretty warps on the looms, there will be lots on incentive for me to get back to weaving.  :)

Counting Down the Days

With an estimate of 'sometime in January' for my surgery to happen, I'm starting to count down the days.  As it is the 14th today, that means that I should hear from the surgeon's office any time now and I'm beginning to look at what else I'd like to accomplish before I'm on weaving hiatus.

Overcoming a serious dose of procrastination I managed to get the last (of the in-hand) interviews transcribed yesterday, got some parcels that ought to have been mailed on Monday packaged up today, and taken a long hard look at the calendar and how many more days I might have to finalize preparations - like packing.

I'm hoping to finish this rose place mat warp yet today before dinner, take the table toppers to guild tonight to hem them so Doug can give them their final press - either before or after we get back -, beam the shawl warp onto the AVL and thread it, if not sley and tie on.  I'd also like to weave a light blue mat warp but we'll see how that goes.

I have the yarns pulled for a 'gentle' shawl warp for the Leclerc Fanny and want that ready to go before I leave, too.

Packing should not take long as I'll mostly be in my jammies but will need some clothing for the one or two days in Vancouver before surgery (we're hoping to find a movie theatre with The Imitation Game showing) and perhaps a day when I get out and the flight home.  And then it will be back to jammies when I get home.  :)

In one way, I suppose it might be easier to wind up on the table as an emergency - not having had months of waiting around.  On the other, I've had plenty of time to get myself mentally prepared for the 2-3 month recovery.  And I remain hopeful that it will only be that long - I know some people who have taken longer than that.  :(  I know that I might not be able to weave much on the AVL right away so I'm hoping that a friend will be able to help me dress the Fanny with more of the 'gentle' shawl warps to help me with physio - weaving is very much going to be a big part of my recovery, just like when I broke my ankle.

Today the sun shone - it really helped lift my spirits.  Now to see how much patience I have to use up until the phone rings...

Next Step

Next step in the process.  (background is a commercially woven throw with spinning motifs woven in double weave)

After the weaving comes the wet finishing.  Doug spent much of Sunday and Monday pressing.  The table toppers are done as are a stack of place mats and table runners.  Still more mats to be run through but Doug has other things he needs to deal with for the next few days.

Unfortunately the dark green and the dark blue just underneath are both very hard to see at night so I struggled a bit with the hemming.  I decided to leave them to daylight but the days are so overcast and dreary right now I don't know that daylight is any improvement!

However, I want to at least finish hemming the table toppers because they are quite wide (41" in the reed) and since range of arm movement is going to be somewhat limited, figured I'd better get them done now.  Once they are hemmed they will get a final pressing and then they will at last be ready.

And yes, I'm still waiting for the phone call firming up the date.  However I'm thinking I should probably drag my suitcase out any time now and start filling it, just in case there isn't much notice between the phone call and when we will need to leave.

Piling Up

Cut the table toppers off the loom this afternoon.  There are five for my customer to choose from.  From the far left, two 100% cotton woven in twill blocks, the rest are in plain weave - from the centre a cotton/linen blend weft, linen weft and 2/16 cotton weft.  Not entirely happy with them - yet - although wet finishing should improve them considerably.

I wound up using a temple, which while slower than not using it gave me better results.  So....

Still no word from the hospital with a firmer date so I'm recklessly continuing on steaming through as many warps as I possibly can.  So far it doesn't seem to be making my back or hip worse, which is good news all by itself.  The bad news is that I'm ignoring computer work, which will have to stop soon so that I don't leave too many things unattended to before we leave, whenever that will be.

Partly I feel as though I need to store up as much weaving zen as I can because it is likely to be up to  three months before I will be able to weave.  Six weeks of no loom time last summer was bad enough!

At this point I just want to get it over and done with.  Thankfully it should not be too much longer.

Trying to decide what to leave on the looms - I've got enough 2/16 bamboo for a warp - sort of - I think I can make it work for a shawl warp.  Since I pretty desperately need more shawls for inventory it would be good to get some more in the queue.

As for the small loom, I've time to weave a few more place mat warps, I think, so I've wound a nice deep red one from the left over red in the table topper warp and have a beige/sage combo pulled for next, maybe.  I've done the math for a shawl warp for the small loom, too, and since that yarn needs just the barest brush of the beater am thinking that might well be my first foray into weaving when I get the all clear.  With any luck I can begin sooner, rather than later.  But it will depend on how the healing goes.

I very much appreciate all the good wishes and the sharing some of you have done privately.  It really helps to hear from people who have already trod the road before me and to hear how much better life will be afterwards.  We will have the iPad with us and I expect Doug will post updates to Facebook for those of you on that.  Who knows, I might even buy some air time in the hospital (they don't have free wifi).  :)

41" x 24 epi = 984

Working on the AVL now that the loom parts have been installed.  I'd intended to have this warp ready to weave on before the parts arrived but USPS and Canada Post conspired to deliver the box days before I expected it!

This warp is the special order and today I made significant progress on threading - just 8" left to do.  It's actually kind of nice to be working with 'thick' yarns - 2/8 instead of 2/16 cotton.  You wouldn't think 24 epi would be all that much faster than 32, but somehow it is.

I have had a little bit of feedback about the Purrington Looms folding floor loom but not what I would call a 'review'.  So far the majority of the feedback has been positive.

So - if anyone is interested in the modifications I would make to the loom to make it closer to my 'ideal' of a portable floor loom, let me know and I will post them here.  Mr. Bannerman says he's willing to make most of the modifications I would like to see - I have no idea what it would cost to get him to customize one of his loom designs - that you would have to discuss with him.

And on a final note - the date for surgery could be as soon as two weeks so I'm really feeling the pressure to get this warp woven and a few other must-be-done things accomplished toot sweet.

Keeping fingers crossed that there aren't very many 'emergencies' that would serve to bump me further down line - and not just for me, but for those who might suddenly find themselves needing emergency cardiac interventions...

Stubborn

Last spring a young friend asked me how on earth I managed to finish the thesis/monograph for the Master Weaver certificate.  She was struggling to finish her thesis for a degree.

Since she was an athlete I figured I would use a metaphor that she could relate to and told her that it was just like running a marathon - when you hit the wall you just keep on going.

There are many times in my life I have wanted to throw in the towel (another sport metaphor!) and give up on something but rarely have I done so.  I'm not talking about little things - a warp that has gone badly awry, for instance - in that case I'm only too happy to use the scissor solution!
 
I'm talking about the big things, the things that matter, deeply.  The things that are, by their very nature, difficult, daunting and at times, may seem nearly impossible.

But I'm stubborn.  I find it mildly amusing that a character fault (according to my mother who frequently wondered where I got my stubbornness from) seems to have morphed into a positive attribute!

Generally just about when I'm ready to toss in the towel, a friend will remind me of what achieving the goal means.  They will help me see that yes, I can get up and get going again.  But it is my choice.  It is always about choice.

Having a research project to look forward to for post-recovery has given me fresh energy and incentive to get things done.  To look forward with enthusiasm rather than dread.  To focus on the after, not the during.  Because once again, this is temporary, I will get through it.  And while the road is going to be a bit bumpy for a while, it is just a small part of the journey.

So a big thank you to my family and friends who remind me of who I really am.  And of what I would like to accomplish as a person and as a weaver/teacher.

Currently reading Common Ground by Justin Trudeau.

A Day

Leclerc loom with 11 meter long warp, about 9 of them woven

AVL, still waiting to be threaded

Meg  from NZ suggested a Day in the Life of our looms, so here's mine as of 11 am January 1, 2015

The small loom is now empty, waiting for the next warp.  The mats are about half way through being cut apart and serged.

The parts for the AVL are en route so I need to get that warp threaded soon so that as soon as they get installed I can fly at weaving off this warp.

I am seriously hoping that the phone will ring next week to set the surgical date and once that happens it will be full speed ahead making arrangements.  

Until they call, I will be jumping every time the phone rings, so send lots of good vibes that they do call soon...

Fuzzy

I have been very low on rayon chenille scarves for the past couple of years and this year after all was said and done, there were just three scarves left.  I could have sold a lot more if I'd had more, and since I still have significant inventory of rayon chenille, I'm revisiting them.

Actually a friend came and wound this warp for me last summer but with my back issues they never got woven.  So it was a slam/dunk to take the already wound warp and get it onto the loom yesterday after I cut the last painted scarf warp off.  I even got it threaded before dinner so it took just a few minutes this morning to sley, tie on and begin weaving.

My challenge now is to use up as much of my rayon chenille stash without buying more to go with it as I can.  Of course that means stretching my creativity to the limit as I'm very low on the colours I like and have plenty that don't sing to me.  But sometimes that's when you really begin to stretch and grow as an artist/artisan.  It is only by pushing our boundaries that we do grow.

My friend wound two warps for me so I'm really hoping I can get both done and deliver the four scarves to the fringe twisting elf tomorrow night.  Since rayon chenille needs a pretty substantial beat, I don't know when I'll be able to whomp away at weaving so I'm trying to get these and some place mats done now.