Balance

 

As a kid, one of the highlights of Sunday night tv watching was the Ed Sullivan Show.  Sometimes he would have 'circus' acts on and I remember several times there would be a performer who would set up sticks, then balance plates on the sticks.  The job then would be to keep the plates spinning in order to keep them on the top of the stick.

Throughout my life I have felt as though I was madly trying to keep plates twirling, trying to keep them from falling to the ground and smashing to pieces.

This time of transition to 'retirement' has meant a new way of spending my days.  A time of letting go of all the sticks, all the spinning plates atop them.  

So far I have managed to not let any of the plates smash to the ground, but rather slowly remove sticks so that I have to keep fewer plates in the air.

A lifetime of priorities has had to be re-thought and set aside for a time or discarded entirely.

I haven't been sleeping well and this morning I slept in.  I had intended to weave my goal of two tea towels but plans were adjusted so that it looks like I may not even get one done.

At first that routine dose of guilt pricked me - a kind of psychic plate smashing to the ground.  

On the other hand?  It's Sunday.  It is the one day a week I get to go out - in a safe way - and spend a couple of hours with friends.  It just won't be here, so travel a short distance will be required.  Which means it isn't looking like I will get to the loom today.

On the other, other hand?  There is no reason why I can't take a day 'off'.

I am, after all, 'retired'.  

That doesn't mean I don't want to get things done.  It just means that I can choose to stop the spinning of the plates and do something else.

I don't know how much longer the Sunday visits will be able to continue, so I have decided that   taking some time 'off' is A Good Thing.  Sleeping in was also A Good Thing.  Having a day without weaving might also be A Good Thing.  

So I will take my knitting and work on that while I sit and visit with a few friends, at a safe distance to protect us all, and enjoy a late summer, early autumn Sunday.

It's all about balance.