When Life has Other Plans

 

I got complacent.  I made plans.  Life decided otherwise.

Yesterday I had one goal - finish threading the loom.  My back was a bit sore, a bit achy, but not overly and so I went down to the loom and threaded for about 40 minutes (my 'usual').  When I stood up to go up for my lunch my back was *very* sore.  I took a muscle relaxant and assumed it would loosen up while I moved around, made lunch, then sat quietly to eat.

When I stood up it was still sore but I went back down because threading has never much bothered me for very long.  Before.

When I finished and went to stand up I could barely straighten, so I went and spent a few minutes on the inversion table, which seemed to help.

Then I laid down, used my massage thingee, felt things loosen, then took a nap to let things calm down.

When I got up at four I was still really sore, but pressing was going to be more active and I would not be bent over so I managed 8 towels, took another muscle relaxant and assumed things would continue to calm down.

I was wrong.

I had a major pain flare and needed the heavy duty pain killers in order to sleep.

So I'm not sure what, if anything, I will get done today.  If I don't sit too long at any one time things go 'better' than if I just sit still.

To say I am upset, disappointed, depressed would all be accurate.  

Someone said to me recently when I complained of being old and decrepit that 'you are only as old as you think you are'.  I told her it wasn't the old part I was upset about, it's the decrepit, and my body is letting me know that it's old and damaged.

Not the most polite of responses, I know.  Up until about 5 years ago I was 'younger' than my number of years - I was in pretty good physical fitness.  Yes, I had some aches and pains and injuries that limited what I could do.  But overall, I was still in better shape than I had any reason to expect given those injuries.

Now?  Now I can't walk too long, stand too long.  Can't (or shouldn't) lift anything heavier than about 10 pounds.  I have pretty much constant pain from the pinched nerve in my back such that I have Rx pain killers so I can sleep when it gets 'bad'.

And yesterday threading my loom became a trigger for severe pain.  I'm being aggressive about using the heavy duty pain killers today because I'm teaching on Saturday.  The down side is the brain fog those cause, but better that than not being able to go at all.  Besides, it's the last day of class so it's a wrap up and I don't have to do anything particularly physical.

But this is just one more confirmation that I cannot travel to teach and potentially teaching in person is not going to be possible for much longer, either.

This morning I'm going to finish pressing the 6 towels I didn't get done yesterday, go to the chiropractor and see if she can use ultra-sound on my lower back and then maybe sley the warp, tie it up and wind bobbins.  

And see how tomorrow will go.  I may leave weaving until Monday.  Back being able as well as willing...