I suppose I feel the stirring of the sap, the rising of life coming back, because I am feeling decidedly restless.
For the past few years I have been on a mission to weave down my stash and mostly what I've done is tea towels with an occasional warp of scarves or other 'samples'.
My fine cotton yarns are 'best' suited for tea towels, however, and I've been producing a steady stream of them.
This morning I woke up feeling at odds with myself. Yes, I want to, *need* to, weave down my stash, but I'm getting tired of 'just' tea towels, I suppose.
The current dive into a new-to-me weave structure has been interesting, but now I'm thinking about how my other fine yarns (rayon) would work with this weave structure for scarves. OTOH, I also have depth of stock in scarves, too.
Even at just two hours or so a day my ability to produce is out stripping my sales. As the shelves fill with completed textiles, the yarn barely seems to go away and I feel like Sisyphus rolling that damn rock to the top of the hill only to have it roll back down again.
I could weave shawls as I'm sold out of those, but that means fringe twisting and I truly don't want to do that.
As I contemplate what comes 'next' I wonder if I keep going or if I take a break, a respite from towels and do a warp of scarves.
My spinning wheel is set up and despite all my best intentions, I still haven't started spinning down my fibre stash, either. What I would rather do is build more jigsaw puzzles, but I know I need to focus my energy on doing something more productive than fiddling with bits of coloured cardboard.
Today I am going to do that other thing I've been ignoring - take another look at the essays that need surgery. My alpha reader says the rest of the essays will be back from her next week, and once they are, I need to write the last one. So that is also on my list of 'to be done'.
Now if I could just harness this restless energy - and chose a path - any path will do, just do it!
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3 comments:
I have had the "I don't want to do what I should be doing" feeling and when that hits I find that I need to take a close look at what I want to do and then figure out how to do that. If I don't do the "what I want to do" I don't seem to do anything productive. Any time the self made rules (lately it is I should finish what I am knitting and not start something new) hit me in the head I end up not doing anything.
This is the same feeling that comes about when I am hungry for something I shouldn't have (candy, cake, etc.). I end up eating way more calories and still feeling hungry than if I had a small piece of what I was hungering for.
I am mentally healthier when I am doing some amount of fiber/hand work but the last few months I haven't done much because of my stupid rules about what I should be doing.
Hope you feel better soon.
I can relate! I just can't figure out what I would rather be doing right now. Nothing I think about takes hold as something that needs to be done 'first'. So I will keep plugging away at the tea towels until something comes along. I think part of the problem is that I am in the 'polishing' stage of the essays which isn't a lot of fun and takes a lot of mental energy. OTOH, I'm very close to getting them ready for the editor and I'm sure once they are 'finished' things will look a lot clearer. Fingers crossed, anyway...
I usually read a book instead of doing 'what I should be doing' when I get that restless 'don't-want-to-do-what-I-need-to-be-doing' feeling. Do something different - just because you enjoy it - for a while. The other things wait patiently for me to get back to them, and I go back with new enthusiasm when I DO go back to them. Hope this works for you, too.
StephanieW
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